I'm gonna live For-evah!

My Little Big Girl is performing in Fame Jr. today/tonight! I am so excited to see her bounding about on stage i can not hardly even stand it. :-)

Also, not sure if i gave adequate page time to this information in previous posts but by Big Big Girl is just completing her first PAID summer work position as an intern at the SF Friend's school! Whoo hoo! Now that she is loaded, I am going to start figuring out how to retire early...!

Seriously Settled

Let's see, I'm pretty exhausted right now but still feeling the need to keep this thing at least sort of up-to-date so I think i'll give the expanded bulleted update and let it go at that.

1) in the new house FINALLY. The actual Movers helping experience was delightful. They were fast, reasonable and very, very nice. Also super nice was/were the ladies who cleaned the bathroom/kitchen/molding,  the guy who cleaned the carpets and the guy who took away the huge pile of trash by the side of the house. seriously, could not have asked for a better set of professional folks. That being said, there was also close to three weeks of post-move moving/re-painting/cleaning/storing in the new basement of stuff that still needed to happen and which resulted in at least one major blow-up at the Spark who when asked to simply accompany me/us on the LAST trip to get stuff  didn't feel like it/got all attitudey and in me throwing my back out [not the *same* incident but still]. {sigh} Still though, finally in and loving the new house. It's just so nicely laid out and has lots of space and the yard is really very peaceful and nice.

2) Spark and Da Wife and Da Wife's Big Sis and Spark's Cousin(s) and G-Ma are getting to see each other a bit more which is lovely. I know it's something that means a *lot* to both Spark and the Wife so, glad to see it's happening..

3) Got to go to the PNDC Summer Deepening in Sonoma where I hobnobbed with Canadians, got to surface some of my "stuff" and potentially made some really nice new friends. Also got connected to the folks who are setting up and trying to move forward with the PNDC institute which is where i'd love to end up working so getting in on the ground floor now is a great thing!

4) Am happy about the supreme court ruling vis a vis gay marriage and the DOMA act and folks being allowed to get (and stay) hitched, in this awesome state of ours!

5) Super thankful to have friends like A-Tail who hook a Chick's Boo up with some fancy paid internships at swankity-swank Quaker schools so she can have something to list on her college apps as well as making enough cash to support her fabulous 15 y.o. life!

6) Helped my Adopted Sister get herself moved the hell out of the place she was living with her (now ex) GF who as treating her like some kind of 50's housewife. I get that "s" has been super difficult what with moving in together right away and blending families and adding in a 14 month old to the mix *but* i also think that this lady has some issues that are hers alone and that it's not an entirely bad thing for ASis to see this as an opportunity to get herself completely out. She may be sad, homeless, broke and supporting two kids BUT she's also resilient and smart and sweet and i feel like she's going to be sooooo much better off once she finally gets to the other side of all this crazy.

7) Almost died from dehydration. Not really, but sure as heck didn't feel so great for a couple of days before getting yelled at by the advice nurse/my doc who are clearly sick of me and my lack of fluid intake: "your chart says you've experienced this before???!" [all raised eyebrows and whatnot] and getting myself a little more liquidated up. Nice, ultimately to stop feeling dizzy/headachey all the time!

8) Got the brakes fixed on the truck and (finally) the oil changed - Whoot Whoot!

9) "Insurance-gate" 2013 with the CP. nuff said.

10) Trying a bunch of different things with regard to the Spark since she continues to be both extraordinarily delightful and as frustrating/irritating as a human being can be; pretty much interchangeably. I'm really working on not letting her provoke me into crazy, intense screaming matches but dammit it's hard. The girl really knows which buttons to kick! Somethings that seem to be working are quigong as a transitioning/wind-down method and singing her her own sleep song (both of which i learned at Deepening!) not that i'm not still getting mad but at least they give me something to try instead of just sitting around being frustrated. And she does seem to respond to them a little bit so... that's nice.

11) and, oh yeah, I'm teaching the Boo how to drive(!!)!

so, that's where we are.

In general things are fab. still tired; still feel like it's all a little too much, but still pretty happy/contented/set so I'm gonna give the life "four thumbs up, Bob!"

Homeowners!

Thas right, folks we are officially owners of our very own a little-too-perfect-to-be-true housey-house in a great little neighborhood next to a great little creek right in the vibrant heart of this glorious city called oak-Town! {whew.} I'm kind of freaking out right this second because we closed a little later than we thought we would and have already set up moving dates and contractors and stuff so it seems like we have fifteen seconds to get everything done but I also know that things will get done (even if it kills me which would ultimately be a shame because it would have been nice to live in the new house for at least a little while...) and that everything will work out (continue to work out) jest fine so... super stressed right this second but knowing that this too shall pass

in other news, got treated to a really lovely Group Mom Tea Party  Social hosted by my lovely 15 year old and her pals as a consolation gift for their spending tomorrow (the actual Mom's Day) at a concert. Needless to say, more than worth it - totally awesome food and fine china and getting serenaded by the three of them playing "an acoustic set" of some of their standards... Priceless! And totally cool getting it a whole day early!

we are buying a house

WE. ARE. BUYING. A. FREAKING. HOUSE! k. just needed to get that off my chest. more later when the rest of the deal is done. (a HOUSE!!)

Househunting 101 - Part 2

Looking for a house to buy is extremely edifying. There are some basics that i feel like we need to have but then there are a bunch of things that come up that i didn't even think about - like what if you actually do like the multi-level house in the cute neighborhood and it's in your price range and everything and if you get it you get to evict the family of five with three kids under the age of five plus their cute, pit-mix puppy. OR what if the "fixer-upper" down the street is suddenly available and you're thrilled because that means you can stay int eh neighborhood but then you find out that it's actually not so much a "fixer-upper" so much as a paint- (please, dear god, let that be paint!) stained, crumbling mess of a place (with no central heat and a "shared" backyard which is still getting a million bids from "investors" whatever that means. OR you find a place that is great. you love it. it works and is basically move-in-able and the listing agent isn't thrilled with the type of loan you have or with your downpayment (she likes your letter though!) but she'll [grudgingly] submit your offer anyway. Just, you know, so you don't sue or something.... It is a very good thing that we have both a fantastic realtor and a stable rental place where we can continue living for the foreseeable future [knock on wood!] otherwise... well, i don't know what otherwise. It is interesting seeing what's out there though. Nothing like a crazy, mostly outside-of-your-control process to make you start thinking about your relative place in the world. [yes, pun intended.]

Househunting 101

Ah... so i'm out looking for a house for us to live in for the rest of our live and i'm realizing that this is EXACTLY like the worst parts of our adoption-of-the-Spark experience. Lots of seeing and not knowing and being told that "all you need to do is..." and finding out that actually, that's not entirely true, and finally finding a place that's PERFECT then realizing that a whole bunch of other people also think it's perfect and that they have more money to offer, bigger down payment, whatever,  than you and that you're not going to get that perfect (or practically perfect because, let's face it, the ones we can really afford are in the "fixer-upper" category. Sorry. Try again and remember to keep a hopeful outlook but don't hope too much. just enough to keep looking but not enough to get sad if/when you don't get it. We're even having to write "why we're great and super deserving and you should give us this kid - er- ah... I mean house!" letters..... {sigh} K. i realize everyone goes through this. i KNOW that. but it still sucks.

Santa Cruz!

Just got back from santa cruz where i took the girls for prezzie's day week-end. Super fun! The weather was grand. Plus the motel was adorable with "enclosed" pool, cute little hot tub, super kid friendly and dog-friendly as well! Spent Sunday on the boardwalk/rode all sorts of scary rides then watched the little girls chase some waves whilst me and  the teen-ager, relax-ie-pants on the sand/shoo'd away the seagulls. Very lovely time overall. A little sad it was so short but you takes what you can gets. :-)

Happy Birthday to Me!

Such a nice age - 45! So nice to have good old and new friends to celebrate the getting older with. I love pretty much everything about my life right now. :-)

Funny thing my big girl said to me pon the eve of my turning:

Her: "I saw a guy on the bus yesterday who you'd totally have a crush on. he'd be my best friend."
Me: i cannot have a crush on your best friend! that would be unseemly."
Her: "why not?" then, knowingly: "o.k. whatever. he'll just be my best friend. [pause] you'd totally have a crush on him though!"
Me: "yeah. probably."

{sigh}

Who would have thunk it!

Just quickly checking in to list some of the very nice things that have occurred lately (in no particular order):

1) Went to New mex for X-Mas. As always it was awesome. SOOOOOOO nice to see my brothers and the Texas nieces and baby cousins and, yes, even mom and pops. Plus, an added bonus - actually found this book i remember having when i was little about two Burros (that's tiny donkeys for you non-natives) who were separated (sad!() but eventually found each other again and lived happily ever after. My mom had it on my old bookshelf. seriously. not sure why that made me so happy, it just did.

2) While in New Mex. i also got to see some old friends (some in a totally accidental way and some i hunted down - DB, thanks for hanging out. yer kids are among the cutest I've seen and your mom + g-rents are still so sweet!)

3) Then once i got back, my Little Buddy ERG come out for a visit which was LOVELY! Really, so very nice to see/chat/plan forward with. Now all i need is some permanently moving back action from you and we'll be good to go!

4) Additionally to all the very nice getting to see folks, i also got invited to attend a conference/get-together thing that is being held by my new good friend SE and at which i hope to be able to build links to some very powerful people in the line of work i hope one day to move into, which, given that i get to basically live with them for a week, is, IMHO totally doable!

5) Other nice things include, getting to watch my Little Big Girl make some fancy-pants banana nut muffins with my BFF, A-tail (they are now officially cooking buddies. It's actually a little too cute to bear) and getting to have some of them whilst they were still hot! (delicious!)

6) Getting to hang out with my other BFF BBQ as she put some final coats of paint on the walls of their FREAKING NEW HOUSE (eh hem)

7) and just generally being so happy and impressed with my little set of family + friends. Sometimes it takes some traveling to realize how good one actually has it, but i do have to say, i'm finding us all quite great right this second!

it's not creepy if it's cute!

K. so i'm reviewing my list of "bands i love" and i'm coming to find that on average the boys tend to have been "born in 1983" which makes me older than god + some kind of cougar = still really, really into them... {sigh}.




and these guys too...

beyond that, not much going on. or rather SO much going on that i haven't found time to capsulize it into a cohesive post so i just carry on hoping that oat some point it will all slow down so i can Reflect or whatever but no... no reflecting. no slowing . just steady march toward ... {sigh}old, I guess.

Little Big Girl's 9th b-day is coming up fast. We're doing all sorts of building/painting etc. on her behalf so that's fun. i'll post pics once things are pulled together in her new "big girl room' -- big Big girl is so grown up and polished and cool and everything it makes me simultaneously proud and sort of in awe. I mean, she's already doing everything so much better than i did/do that i just don't know where she'll end up. I do know that it'll be amazing, though, that's fer sure. It's all kidn of like a really great movie that you're not sure where it's going to go but you don't' want it to stop either...


In other news/on the home front, married life is going well.I love my wife so much right now. it's actually slightly disconcerting. :-}

blah. anyways... i'm taking an opportunity to post here because i just got finished with some work stuff and don't need to be anywhere else yet but I think i'm going to head out so... love ya'all! oxoxoxox. I'll try to write more later. We'll see how it goes.

Status update

sad, because my Big Teen-age Girl is in Portland right now and I miss her.
happy, because me and the wife are getting along/had a nice night last night filled with friends and children and spaghettit/pizza.
relived, that this proposal i promised to do finally done/sent off.

all-in-all... things seem to be good. Still a little sad though.

Happy Birthday, baby!

Happy b-day to the Wife! happy being 41...er...ah.. i mean 25!!!!

bullits, please

the life is waaay crazy busy right now so i'm only going to note the highlights as bullited items

• I'm sick. nothing new but it's why i have time to sit in one place and write right now
• Thanksgiving was delightful. The A-Beane totally saved the day by going to pick up our turkey for us whilst i sat in unbelievable amounts of traffic. Then we had the co-rents over and had waaaay too much to eat and sat around and it was great.
• CP and the Other Pretty Co-Rent are preggos!! Yay! Couldn't happen to a nicer set of folks. Spark is beside herself excited. The Boo is pretty anticipatory as well. (Just between you and i, i happen to know for a fact that they're having a girl because i had a dream and my dreams are NEVER wrong. Except the ones where i'm flying and that just may be something that just hasn't happened yet....!) 
• Went to and came back from Israel. Amazing. I loved it. The trip was exhausting but so very lovely and inspirational and mind-expanding, blah, blah, blah but really -- soooooo glad i got to go and so glad i went.
• X-mas = also lovely. Felt a bit rushed due to the fact that I got back second before the actual day but the tree The Spark picked out was grand and i do love breaking out the x-mas decorations!
• Got the best boots for my B-Day from the Angel and the D-Boy in the Tex of As. They. are. beautiful.
• Heard from DB that they may be close to re-locating the babies and the grandparents back to Japan soonish. (Everyone is in NM right now homesteading whilst DB and the Little Lady work on making Tokoyo a more conducive place to grow up in/not die of radiation poisoning. Fingers crossed for them. i imagine it's hard to be apart for so long.
• The Teenager is going to her first High School Dance social thing and she has a FANTASTIC dress! Really quite spectacular that she selected herself and was sashaying around in just a little bit ago.
• I had a really serendipitous opportunity present itself over the last few days about which i am wildly excited but am not going to say much so as not to go jinxing anything (!!) {squeal}
• Dogs escaped from the backyard and somehow made it all the way to the tiny island-city next to ours before being brought to justice. Thinking of changing their names to Bonnie and Clyde.
• Adam Ant, who i was going to see in just a few weeks has re-scheduled his show for October making me sad but strangely o.k. with it.
• Pretty Boy is engaged to be married to his very lovely lady-friend, which is awesome
• My OTHER long-lost roomie buddy, R-Pick just recently wed his long-time GF as well -- also spectacularly awesome (although he announced it by changing his status on Facebook which does give me a rather slight pause/shiver vis a vis the world today but whatev...)
• Family is doing well in gen. Everyone is healthy and growing. (Basically i plan on being the shortest member of our little group by the year 2014)
• My and the Wife seem to be getting along. Not a bunch of time to actually see each other but when we do find it, it tends to be sweet. :-)
• Work, kind of a lot but predictably so. {sigh} Hopefully we'll get things a little more sorted out over there so everything doesn't have to be so silly all the time but regardless, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE my new team. they = awesome.

K. that's it for now. i'm feeling the strain of being upright/need to be in a more fit shape later today to go pick up some childrens so.... Ta til later.

two weeks and counting

You know what's cute?? A crate full of pit bull puppies that's what!

Me and the Little Big Girl just got back from taking the kitten (and friend) to the vet clinic over on Broadway (which I LOVE, BTW) and in addiction to all the randomly just sort of generically cute dogs/cats that were there, some man rolled in with a crate full of Pit puppies - about nine of them, all about 4-6 weeks old! Seriously, there ought to be a law.

{sigh} So, we're getting closer and closer to that magical Nov. 29 trip to the land of the Israel and i'm getting a little panicky about having everything as sorted out as possible. I mean I know everything will be fine, but i'm also kind of a mess right now (inside, where you can't see it as opposed to my usual external squalor which i totally own/think is kind of cute!) ...

also just realized that i've not really sat down to document the life in a REALLY long time so feeling a little lacking on that front as well. Not lacking in the sense that i plan to do anything about it, just like maybe i should. :-)

broke my toof!

Doh! i cracked my tooth last night (chewing gum. that's right. gum. i am officially a mess.) and now it's all jagged and annoying and my dentist can't fit me in until monday. Probably need a root-canal crown. Blah.

Plus, i'm already all stressed out about money (or lack thereof). Double blah!  

the good the bad and the just plain sucky

This week-end was intense. All our bikes were stolen. This is less about me because i am a slug from way back but the Wife and the Big Big Girl and to some significant extent, the Little Big Girl LOVE their bikes. And they had really nice bikes. Sad. We do have renter's insurance and the Wife is busily looking into getting things documented and sorted through and eventually, i feel like we'll get replacement bikes but still...A weirdly annoying counterpoint to an otherwise normal Friday.

We also got a kitten. A little orange stripey one. it came from a semi-feral mom who produces litters every couple of months and this time she popped out a few orange ones which is like CRACK to my Wife so... The Boo and her buddy went and rounded one up and here we are! Cute coming out of our ears!

Then, I got to go on this nifty "three-hour cruise" thing with my buddy IHOEL which was fabulous. Really, the cruise itself was a vendor relation thing but the vendors happen to be adorable/super nice, the food was tasty (the big sized food at least. I wouldn't go near the tiny stuff with a ten-foot-pole but my erstwhile partner in crime assured me it was by and large "fine"), the view was insane/amazing and i met some other folks who were "in IT" but who also managed to not have soul-sucking careers so.... all very refreshing.

Also spent the week-end driving the Little Big Girl around to various parties which was good practice for me as it is what i will no doubt be doing all day every week-end from the point at which she turns 12 to the point at which she gets her license.

All in all, a busy, action-packed, kind of chaotic week-end. some good, some bad, not so much sucky really just lots of "lots"!!

Art and Soul

You know what i love? I love brown people. Seriously, this may be one of those "I can say it because i am it" but really, a BIG part of why I am so stupid in love with Oakland is, in large part due to the fact that it does things like host Art and Soul where large groups of fabulous folks sportin' myriad shades of brown skin, show up to just hang the heck out. I mean, there's singers, artists, community organizations, families, teens, hawkers, assorted 20-30 somethings with their screechey observations -- it's just loud and fantastic and cute as hell. Plus the ladies are BEAUTIFUL. All "done" hair and berry-red lipstick; pretty clothes, and sunglasses and smiles.... Man. Fun too. we went on rides (and by we i mean the Little Big Girl and her friend), had some garlic fires, watched some amazing dancing (Dance-A-Vision - i'm writing that in here because it's an awesome all-ages-dance company and i'm sure my Little Big Girl will someday own it!); ran into old friends (what up, AEG and O-GVers!) made some new ones - LaLaGirl, you know we're meant to be BFFs! cawl me! The weather was great as well. {sigh} Why can't every street party be like this?

Holy be-jezus!

Whew. K. so just back from a fantastic Hollywood vacay (Universal Studios, Madame Tussaud Wax Museum, Book Soup book store, World's Biggest reptile Show, oh my! Stay tuned for pics!); the Big Big Girl has started high school (eek!); the Little Big Girl had her Musical theater camp show (Honk, Jr.) (awesome-pants); we got to visit the Mistah L-L's (to help celebrate the King's 2nd birthday and finally get to meet his Little Princess month-old sister "Pea"!) and most recently, we just attended a super lovely last-bash-before-the-big-shoulder-surgery dinner party at the BBQ's where i, once again, was reminded why i love hanging out with my best-est and closest buddies soooooo much.

It's crazy that the life is so crazy but it's going so well i think it's probably worth the exhaustion!

SummerBridge, we hardly knew ye

And so it goes... tonight's Celebration marks the last performance/day of the kick-a** program that kept my big Girl off the mean streets lo these last three years and (arguably) eased her way into the high school era that will begin in a mere three weeks. I'm so proud of you, Miss Boo. You're such a trooper -- giving up all those lazy days for weeks of homework, fieldtrips, forced comradery and early rising! You were a star in that star of a program and while i'm glad you're (finally) finished i'm also a little sad to see yet another significant milestone in your lifetime of achievements go flying by. {sniff - pass the tissues please}

Good stuff has happened

and annoying stuff as well.

First, the good:

1) I'm going to Israel! Thaz right, Baby! The "largest immigrant-absorbing nation on earth", birthplace of the guy who could very well have been the "last" Son of G*d to circulate freely 'monst da peeps (shhhhh! Don't tell the Mormons!); a nation-state which purportedly scoffs at idea of signing a nuclear non-proliferation treaty and yet was "the first nation in the world to adopt the Kimberly process, an international standard that certifies diamonds as 'conflict free.'"

This is the highly debated; mostly unknown; I'm sure largely misunderstood place to which i am receiving an expense paid trip to visit through a grant/scholarship program thing set up at my work and I just have to say (again) that I count myself among THE luckiest people on the planet! Plus, and perhaps more importantly, by going to this beautiful/political hotbed of a land, I may actually, finally find out why "Kiss Legend, Gene Simmons" somehow figured into the results for every search i've done so far on the place!

2) Having the girls around at camp and coming over after the SB program ends all summer has been beyond cool and probably the biggest thing i will miss once school starts again in mid-August.

3) We're going horse back riding! Me and the Big girl. For a half day, right before school starts. Just the two of us because unfortunately the place doesn't accept younger riders (actually, they didn't accept my Big girl age riders but i called and begged/lied just a tiny bit to get her in!) but i think it will be fabulously fun.

4) I'm really liking our Flea Market Crew Faux-B-Q's (I tried that made up term on the Wife earlier today and she was unimpressed but i think i'm still gonna "use it til i break it!" or whatever that phrase is...!) I think the peeps on my FMC were all really quality people and i'm delighted we seem to be able to have figured out the "staying in touch when we don't have to" part of friend making. This week-end is our turn to host! Whoo hoo! I know, not sure why i'm so excited about that other than it sort of means the Wife has to come but still... i think it'll be fun.

5) we're going on vacation soon. A real actual vacation with the fam to HOLLYWOOD! yay! seriously. i am packing sunscreen, my shades and a bikini. (Ha! that was kind of fun to write seeing as i am currently not even remotely involved with ANY of the aforementioned [see item 4 below].)

6)My A-Tail got herself a delightful job at a fantastic place and i'm sooooo happy for her! Yay!

7) Dirty Boy is back in the states for the time being (and yes i realize this could rightfully go on either list but i'll put it here because i'm so proud of him for being a stand up kind of guy who takes care of his babies/his s***!) which means there is some likelihood of me meeting the children instead of just being treated to pictures of them that are at best five to seven years shy of "current".

8) My girls are awesome. they just are. the Big Girl is so insightful and funny and gracious and BEAUTIFUL and the Little One is suddenly moving into this very lovely mix of silly and sweet and super aware/explanatory (while still retaining the very real ability to make me crazy at a moment's notice!) -- I'm just beyond amazed that i get to see them and interact with them and claim them (on any level). I do not know what i did to deserve such fantastic-ness but i am in awe of their person-hood every single day at least once if not multiple times throughout!

...

And then there's the Bad

1) it's 81 degrees in my house right now. It's hot and not in a good way. sucks.

2) Cloudy the Rat passed away.

she put up a good fight but didn't quite manage to win her last bout. We still have the Daisy but Cloudy was a special little gal who will be muchly missed.

3) Work is hard. Seriously, it just kind of sucks right now. I think/am sure it'll get better soon but Holy-Jesus-to-the-Cristo, i don't care what anyone says, doing your job(ish) plus two halves of two other people's if freaking ridiculous!

4) I'm getting kind of pudgy. There. I said it. at the ripe old age of 43 i am admitting to being in a shape i am not particularly happy with. And we're not just talking "I wish i could run/walk up those stairs without having to stop for a lengthy rest every five steps or so" I really am at a point where i (I) am looking in a mirror or at a scale at the doctor's office where i have to go because i SPRAINED THE TOP OF MY FOOT doing....?! Yes, exactly! Doing NOTHING! and i think "whoa! really??? O.k. no more jelly toast/red wine for me!" [she says as she has another sip of the shiraz by the keyboard]. And it's not just that i'm thinking i'm a bit bloated or that I'm "letting myself go" due to my happily married state... it's more that the body has changed significantly while i was busy focusing on other stuff. I wasn't paying attention and now i'm all puffy. granted I may get fine with being puffy but for right now it's disconcerting having my "go-to" pants fitting all weird.

5) I'm tired. I feel like i always say this but it's always true. I need to get more sleep. i'm tired and i think that makes me grouchy/unpleasant. i know it makes me more yell-ey [she says, staying up late to continue typing]......

{sigh}

actually, i think that's it. I just wanted to try to capture some of what's been going on so it's not completely lost to The Record. Sort of sorry now that i started with good and ended on bad. Really it's a mix and things, in sum, are fine. really. S'all good. I'm happy. tired but happy. really, really happy. :-)