Thursday, March 23, 2017

Bi-yearly check-in

Big Big Girl is in her second year of college. She's seriously considering changing her major (form BS is Astro-physics to BA in Anthropology with a minor in Ethnic Studies. she's back at home (still staying in both the SF house and the oakland digs. Was working part-time at the cafe at my work but is now concentrating on school and traveling (been to Germany witht he young man, to europe several times with her other fam and going to europe again with friends this summer!) and such. She broke up with the young man for predictable reasons. I'm sort of amazed at how well she managed that process - clearly feeling the emotional parts (loss, sadness, anger, resignation) while still keeping on moving forward in a thoughtful, self-protective way. It's interesting because in her path i keep seeing things i think i have and/or would have done that i think are "the right way to do something" but she's doing those things in a more complete way, better and earlier than i ever managed. I stick to my assessment that we all arrive on this planet with an "age" an that she is and has always been in her early 40's.

The Little Big Girl is also doing well. She's doing well at school, growing and learning  in  all sorts of ways; she has a mixed set of friends and the respect/approval of her teachers. She is learning more about herself and her "ways" and is really trying to get a manageable groove set up. She is also very beautiful and - like the rest of her screen-addicted generation - is running into the age-old unrealistic beauty standards conundrum that women everywhere are facing down. being dark and curvy and dreadlocked sets her apart from the majority of the bloggers she likes to watch but she also carried very firmly within her the knowledge that she is a person to be reckoned with and as such doesn't seem to driven to change who she is. She is stubborn though and capricious and quick-tempered. some of this is, i'm sure absolutely due to her being a teen-ager and hormones, etc. but it is also her being her (remember, The Wife has that same passionate nature) and as she learns the borders of her internal whirlwind, i am also learning how it affects me and ways in which i can work to have it not.

the Wife is doing swell as well. She is settled back at the job/company she was with when we first knew each other so long ago. they love her, she enjoys them. It feels like she's finally settled after several years of drifting around through start-ups and other random engagements. She's playing tennis, playing guitar, talking to both of her sisters (they came back together when her mom died) and just generally doing well. She is still stubborn, capricious and quick-tempered (sound familiar) but i can see that she's moving forward to meet the Little Big Girl in some of the harder places they both get themselves into and it's interesting to watch how they connect with and love and really need each other.

Our house is lovely. it's never quite clean but it is a perfect size for us and is holding up admirably to the winter storms. Big Big Girl and her buddy C were here today playing with the dogs in the front yard and it made me very delighted to watch them.

Work = fine. In the middle of a Big project, of course, but working with same excellent team and better handle on it than last time so i'm not particularly worried.  

Still making dolls (although a bit obsessed with getting the eyes right) -  trying to get myself motivated to exercise again. I am carrying around alot more tummy than I ever have before and more than i like so.... I have my super cool bike plus a gym at work - seems like i can figure out way to try to be a little more fit.

Going to have a lovely night out with The Wife tomorrow which i am looking forward to - gonna swap out my wedding rings onna counta 1) the current set is too tight [see getting fat comment above] and 2) because it's been almost a decade now the i've been married and i'm feeling like a different person in it than the Gal who came to it originally. i'd like my hardware to reflect that so.... two cool new rings to carry me forward into the next decade.