Now that we've all "grown" a little...
DB just found/sent me this personal ad he wrote a little while ago [reprinted with permission from the author]:
"Thinking of Awesome Titles Sucks!
Age: 30
Location: New Mexico
For real. Geez. What hard work and I didn't even start yet. K so I guess I'm a super lamewod but I'm just going to come out and say a few things:
Right now, I might be the loneliest person in the world. Definitely the lamest, but that's okay, I have a huge, uh...heart.
I only just recently realized that my poetic and charming nature has long been dormant, and somehow I should really try to get it back.
I miss kissing someone and thinking how lucky I am, and then thinking "hey this chick is lucky too damn". All sloppy and open-mouthed.
I'm tired of convincing myself that I'm happy, and admitting this now, even with virtual invisibility, stings a little.
I am flawed. Sometimes I'm temperamental and I have a dirty fucking mouth. And Orbit gum doesn't clean it up.
When I look back and read over this I will hate every desperate word...but I will not change it 'cuz I'm a stubborn bastard.
There's got to be someone out there who would actually want to love me, right...?
I used to be good at sex. (holy crap) I wonder if I ever will again. (Jesus, James)
I love sad music.
I am NOT medicated. And sometimes I think I should be. But fuck Earth.
My roommate just asked what a personal ad is. ? (and now I'm trying to figure out who the loser is)
Morrissey was better than The Cure. Yes he was.
I am sooo tired of porn. Seriously.
I quit smoking 08/21/07.
I quit drinking 2 years ago.
I quit smoking weed 3 1/2 years ago.
I quit doing coke almost 5 years ago.
I quit doing ecstasy 6 or 7 years ago.
You quit reading 12 lines ago.
I've been convincing myself that I don't love someone for almost 3 years.
I love green tea even though it makes me pee like mucho A LOT.
I'm a cancer, so I only SOUND like I'm desperate and unattractive, but I'm really neither. Jesus I'm hot. Okay I'm alright.
I want to evolve with someone emotionally more than anything in the world.
Evolving together spiritually and intellectually would be great too, and while we're at it, can I have some sex please? Okay maybe next time then.
I have a cat named Turkey and he's a fuckin' fatso. God Turkey, you're disgusting. I love you Turkey.
I just bought a king size bed and I feel so alone in it, even though it's super comfortable. And masterbation is sooo overrated. Too much info I know my bad.
Note to self: If this outreach effort doesn't go too well, go back inside your shell where it's warm and safe.
I could love someone with no aspirations, and that's something I never thought I could say, but I could love someone like no other.
I want to meet someone who will love me even if I turn out to be a total failure.
I think 98% of you would have stopped reading by now if you weren't trying to avoid doing those dishes.
I'm the author of "Shakespeare never wrote about us". Who? Wha? It's okay, nevermind.
I have the shocker sticker in my back window and people flip me the shocker every day, which I think rocks. My dad thinks it means rock n' roll because I just couldn't hear myself explaining that one. "Well, you see Dad..."
Is it impossible to meet a cute chick that's also sweet, preferably one that digs cancer men? For my sake, I fucking hope not, 'cuz it's a bit late to change signs.
I was born on July 7th, 1977 and I'm the 7th grandson. Freaky. I know. But do you see why my portrait is next to "rad" in the dictionary. C'mon people.
So I guess I'm meant to be here. Even on crappy days like today.
On a much lighter note, I have a burrito in the microwave so I have to wrap this up."
Seriously folks, am I the only one out there who thinks the boy
must have once been
kinda "worth the effort"??? ;-)