"Communication breakdown," my ass!

This post is going to be crabby.

i've had no sleep, my baby has elected screaming as her primary mode of communication and my truck needs new brakepads.

Plus, I get home last night with aforementioned Miss Screamy-Pants in tow to find this message on my machine:

"6:10pm - {beep} Hey, Chick, it's CP. Is Boo with you??! {click}"

Seriously. If you ever want to make a co-parent's heart STOP BEATING leave a message on her goddamn machine asking where the child that she left in what she considered a fairly safe place at the beginning of the day for you to pick up at the end of the day (following a schedule that's been established for the better part of THREE years, BTW way, no surprises here) is. go ahead. It's fun. Really! Then when she calls you back in a panic, laugh and say "She's at BV? I'm at AFY. You didn't tell me where she was going to be [two face-to-face-conversations + one e-mail="not telling"] so I just assumed she was over here [why?? Why would you assume that she would be someplace she has only ever been once in her entire life for about two days and that we agreed was useless and out-of-the-way??!] Anyway, [here's an attempt to make ME feel better for dropping the ball] it was probably just a communication breakdown. Can you call them and let them know I'm on my way?"

AAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!!!!!!!!

{breathe} I'm going to say this slowly so that it is crystal clear to every single person in the world who has ever considered attempting this. Do. Not. Co-parent. Just don't. Unless you can figure out how to somehow do it differently. The thing is CP is a "good" co-parent. Given the various stories I hear from other people who are trying this, she's downright stellar. She's at the top of her game and still I am forced to entertain thoughts for close to half and hour about how completely not worth living my life would instantly become should I suddenly find out my Boo had gone missing. {sigh} Seriously, I think the best thing my dad ever did for my mom was to exit stage right pretty much the second he realized he was useless as a parent. We turned out great. My mom didn't have to deal with this particular load of crap. And Pops got to swoop in as the best G-pa in existence so it all worked out....