Actual conversations I had today

Number 1

Kid: Why are you sad?
Me:I'm not sad. I'm just tired.
Kid: {dubious expression. Obviously not buying it for a SECOND}
Me: Well, I'm sort of sad. I have meetings all day today.
Kid: And they're not going to be fun?
Me: Probably not.
Kid: Hmm. well why don't you pretend every meeting is a movie.
Me: Come again?
Kid: A movie. Like say you're in one and it's Toy Story. Who's in it with you?
Me: The meeting?
Kid: Yes.
Me: Um, Buying and Inventory Guy.
Kid: O.k. so when B&I Guy starts talking you wait for him to finish then you yell "YOU'RE - A - TOY! You can't fly or melt things with your laser beam! You're an action figure!"
Me: {coffee spurts out my nose}OMG! that'd be GREAT! I'm totally going to do that!

[cue a good hour of me and kid inventing other movie related non sequiteurs to bring up during the boring bits interpersed with scandalous amounts of giggling...]

+++++++++++++++++++++++++
Number 2

Boss: You hired someone else?
Me: Well, yeah, technically. I mean they're not actually my person. they're not part of my department...
Boss: But you hired them?
Me: Uh. Yeah. Well, I "facilitated" hiring them. You said I should figure out a way to man the project right?
Boss: Yes.
Me: Did you have something else in mind?
Boss: No.
Me: Am I missing-
Boss: I'm just saying, that's three people you've hired now.
Me:Uh huh. {confusion}
Boss: So, you can't hire any more without giving someone up.
Me: You understand they all do completely different jobs, right?
Boss: Yes. I understand that. But it adds up. You can't hire any more people this quarter.
Me: Even if they're for other departments?
Boss: Yes.
Me: Um. O.K.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++
Number 3

Me: So, I've got some sort of massive oil leak and the transmission is making a tick-tick-tick sound {mental note to self, previously delivering this kind of info to Car People at the Dealership means they charge me $300.00 just because I made them type in the "customer states" field.}
New Car Guy: Hmmm. O.K. I'll have a look.
Four hours later (as opposed to days at aforementioned dealership)
New Car Guy:O.K. it's fixed. Your oil filter had shrunk and there was no oil in the engine so that's why it was knocking. I changed the oil, replaced the filter and topped off the tranmission fluid.
Me: Wow! That's great. How much?
New Car Guy:$35.00.
Me: Excuse me?
New Car Guy:$35.00. I just charge you for an oil change.
Me:I love you.
New Car Guy: {embarrassed silence} Um... so, are you going to come get it today or tomorrow?

Two of these conversations made me incredibly happy. One made my head hurt. All-in-all, I think that's leaves me feeling pretty good. :-]