and the word for today is...

Ineffectual! Man, I just got out of an "overview/status" meeting at work that kicked my ass! i mean, f***. The world is going to hell in a handbasket and for some reason it all feels like it's my fault. Or rather it's not specifically my fault but it's happening and I'm not there and so it feels like I should 1) at least know more than I do about it, 2) do something more than I am doing about it and/or failing that 3) at least be around to support the bastards who ARE there trying to sort things out.... {sigh} I mean, I get that I need to do this (aka bond with my new child) but it's hard not to feel responsible when crap happens in my department and people need me to decide things or assure them about things or make phone calls about things and I've got two kids in tow and fifteen minutes to spend on any given item... Plus, I'm tired. Blah.